A new day..

A new day which comes with a new outlook on a couple of things and I am going to try my best to stay on track with it.  My eyes have been opened to a few things recently..some I agree with, which are the ones that I will work on, a couple have left me quite confused and a few I don’t agree with at all.  I have been checked and in that I have checked myself in one department.  It is not me to hurt people and cause uneasy/uncomfortable feelings, that is the last thing I want to do, and absolutely the last thing I ever intend to do.  That’s not my style.  It could be a number of things that led to this…I let myself become too comfortable and was under the impression that they really knew me, maybe its the fault of the other party for not letting me know that something was bothering them and therefore led to built up frustration regarding the issue, or it’s that they jumped on a bandwagon.  I don’t know and most likely never will.  That’s ok.  What matters is that I am aware of a few things now.  The unfortunate part is a friendship was lost, but was it a friendship in the first place?  I was under the impression that it was but after learning what I have I question my thinking.  I question it for the fact of how it was brought to my attention, how quick it was brought to an end without an attempt to reconcile it and that is why I question if it was what i thought it was.  I’m leaning towards no.  That is completely fine, I chalk it up to another life lesson.  People come into our lives and they leave, it’s just how the world works.  I have always had many friends and always will, this I know, so I found it a little humorous when there was an attempt to ‘school’ me on the ways of certain types of relationships.  I have never had a problem so as I appreciate the advice I really don’t need it.  There are people that you will just click with and some that will take a while to find out if you do or not, truly .  The ones that do just ‘click’ are the ones that will be by your side, the ones that take a while can go one of two ways.  It’s unfortunate when they go but it is what it is and that is just how life works.  I know that I am a good person, a caring, giving person so when I find out that I have hurt someone in some way it bothers me.  It goes along with the guilt I feel when I ruin someone’s day, I just hate it whether or not I was wrong or right.  It doesn’t matter because I feel guilty.  I have to remind myself with certain situations to take a step back and look at the whole picture, to truly look and take into consideration many things.  Sometimes you will find that it isn’t what you thought or what you have been beating yourself up about.  When that realization comes to light and reality shines through the guilt is alleviated and you move on.  This I have done.  I know and the people close to me know the true me, the person I am.  They have taken the time to get to know me, what I am about, they way I think, my sarcasm, my heart.  And those are the ones that I will keep close.

 

 

About Jamie

Taking my time through this A-Mazing thing called my life. I'm the owner and photographer at The Adore Girls here in Nashville TN. Life is what you make of it and I am making mine...AMAZING!

Posted on November 27, 2010, in Events, Friends, life, Other and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. I especially find the part about clicking immediately versus something taking time to develop easy to relate to. I have found more success in the instantaneous click and my gut instinct. It is almost as if when you are forced to try too hard to make it work you are doomed from the start. But I am slightly biased because I think you are awesome! 🙂

  2. exellent, love reading your work.

  3. like my grampy would say,(hack cough cough) “Screw em!”

  4. I have had the great fortune of long friendships from both types. And in those friendships, there have been disagreements and some misunderstandings. My true friends, those that really cared for me not just wanting something from me, always spoke about any bad feelings, we hugged it out and the friendship grew stronger. When a friend had an abrupt turn about, I had come to know that this was a way to stop the friendship. Odd way to put it, but that is what it was. It stopped. No discussion, no call, nothing. It took many years to learn that. A co-worker from a while ago, would attach to a person, say they were the best BFFs. Two months later, drop her for the slightest reason. I personally felt she liked the rush of “new friends.”
    You never know, perhaps this person will cross paths with you again someday…in a good way. As long as you know what is in your heart…let go. Or….as marina’s grampy says………………. 🙂

  5. Great advice Barb, thank you very much!

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