My 2010 Summarized in Statuses.

Wow I have a whole bunch of nothing.  What I do have is a summary of my favorite facebook statuses from 2010 thanks to a dumb application on facebook.  I had a friend post theirs and I was looking for a way to rot my brain even more so I decided to try it out…

January:

  • schools closed again tomorrow, really? Seriously?  Can I go ahead and slit my wrists now or should I wait?!?!

February:

  • …schnazzy…
  • annoyed by the complete douchebags that go out in public.
  • I am thinking my brain took the day off…I wish it would have called in and told me…this is going down as an unexcused absence.
  • I heart Fun Dip
  • It started off as a productive day, then I said the hell with it.
  • Just listened to Will & Gavin make robot voices talking into the fan.

March:

  • walked in my closet…looked down and my flip flops were crying…they are so lonely…soon flippies..soon.
  • so much to do and I am sitting here on my couch watching mindless tv while cuddling and consoling my flip flops
  • watching Will & Jman play the Old Super Mario Bros. and Jordan didn’t understand something about it and Will looked at him and said “Jman you got to remember this is old school”
  • I see wine in my near future…wait!..It’s in my hand!
  • is hurt…I got into a fight with a big bottle of wine last night and the wine won…it cheated.
  • Just had my butt handed to me by someone living inside my Wii…that was rough.
  • Life throws you curve balls and sometimes we swing but there are times we watch the ball and knock it right out of the park!

Apirl:

  • ice cold coors light on a beautiful hot day…refreshing.
  • so I was on a date with Mr. Motivation when Mr. Procrastination showed up and they got into a huge scrap in the front yard.  Mr. P beat the poopy out of Mr. M…I think you can figure out the rest.
  • Dinner at Big River with Dad and Susie..Awesome.  Me being the one to tell Dad and Susie its time to leave the bar and go home-PRICELESS.  Just between you and me I am pretty sure they were partying like Rock Stars.
  • 5 years ago today a little girl was born who would WOW the world with her beauty, her smile, her laugh..who would make her daddy melt with every smile..who would make us laugh at the most random thoughts…who brings us much joy and happiness each and every day..Happy Birthday Emily!  We love you.
  • Dear God, How have you been then?  I’m not fine, fuck pretending  All this death you are sending  Best throw some free heart mending  Invite you in my heart then  When done, my sins forgiven?  This God of mine relaxes  World dies I still pay taxes. – Lyrics to a song that got to me this morning.

May:

  • I’m going to start building an Ark..Who’s with me?  We need some main essentials..food, water, mimosas, beer, crown and a boom box.
  • A warning just popped up on the tv saying “Nashville and surrounding areas…You are Fucked!”
  • It’s hard to wrap my head around the severity of this disaster here.  So many people have lost everything and now it’s time to do our part and help in any way we can.  It’s only going to get worse before the rivers and creeks crest.  It’s time to come together.
  • We do not need the national coverage, we have this all on our own..we are an amazing city that will bounce back bigger and stronger than before.  In the words of my sister…”We Got This. We Are Music City”.  During all of the devastation and disaster I would not want to live any where else..I am proud to call Nashville my home..I am a Nashvillian…
  • Thinking about Billy and the rest of the Sunbelt Crew who have been working very hard, non-stop around the clock with the clean up of our city.  I have not talked or seen Billy in over 24 hours and I know the rest of the Sunbelt families have not seen their husbands hardly at all.  Good work guys!  Know that all of your hard work and sweat is very much appreciated!
  • System of a Down rock my world today…
  • I neeeed to talk-a to somebodeeee thata speeeeka chineeese…its whats for dinner.
  • wow wow wubzy just said ‘tooter scooter’..that’s funny
  • I’m super!  thanks for asking!

June:

  • Jaaaamie…Jaaaamie…come to me.  That is the pool calling and I must obey the power of the pool
  • Sitting at Rebar watching the lead singer of Kings of Leon play Cornhole…I heart Nashville.

July:

  • is crispy…I came home done but as time passes I am now Well Done…I need some aloe
  • So all evening I have been thinking about the Oreos in the pantry…get the kids in bed..movie on ready for some milk and cookies and then I remember…I DON’T HAVE ANY MILK!  CRAP!  It’s a sad night, all a girl wanted was oreos with some milk!
  • Going to the swimming hole today for some much needed sunnage, waterage and swimmage.
  • hi ho hi ho…it’s off to swim we go, going to have some fun and get some sun..hi ho hi ho hi ho

August:

  • sometimes I wish I could control time, be invisible, have laser for eyeballs…slow down here, fast forward there, zap here, disappear there…where are my super powers?  Maybe I need a cape and they will work..yeah that’s it!
  • still trying to make sense of the people we met last night….We will call last night “The Night of the Crazies”
  • getting ready to enter ‘the closet of doom’..if you don’t hear from me in an hour send help or at least booze..Thanks.  peace.
  • Style’n

September:

  • See your beauty…Love yourself…You ARE beautiful.  Love, Jamie
  • I hate flies, I wish I had lasers for eyeballs so I could zap them when they came near.  Dirty Bastards.
  • Billy has a chicken on the grill with a beer can stuck up its butt.  I wonder if it will have beer farts?
  • Trying to figure out why Will feels it necessary to say ‘hey mom’ or ‘hey dad’ before everything he says…We are still looking at you from what you just got done saying..I assure you we are still listening.
  • Just made Freshly Pressed!
  • I am completely retarded with my left hand…just wanted to put that out there.
  • champion.
  • just so everyone knows I am such a dork when I am home by myself..besides the fact that I talk to myself and my dog like he is going to answer me.

October:

  • Walked up through the fair and got stopped by a carni and he proposed..how sweet..I ran.
  • Sometimes you must laugh at yourself because if you take yourself to seriously you might have to admit yourself.  -Yours truly.
  • I think Fox News just turned rescuing the miners into a dating show.  “next minor up is ___,  who is 34 and single, he has hypertension, diabetes and hearing problems.”  Next line should be….Ladies if you are interested please call 1-800-***-****, he could be your next husband.
  • Dear Creator of the Silly Band Craze..I would like to meet you and shake your hand for making my kids insanely crazy with these things to the point of me finding them all over my house and in my laundry.  While I shake your hand I will kick you in the ding dong or hoo-ha and when you are on the ground crying in pain I will steal all of your money and wish you a good day.
  • Can someone please explain to me why Tyra Banks has a show in the first place and why it has lasted this long?  This is the title of her show today “Hell to Pay: Gay Teen Exorcism”  Are you f’n kidding me?  If I could slap a celebrity it might be her.
  • drowning in laundry…HELP!  *gurgle gurgle*  I’m going under…I’m gone.
  • out to run an errand before the storm hits.  All I need to worry about at the moment is the wind.  I have attached double sided duct tape to my tires so not to blow off the road.  Duct tape is awesome.
  • What time is it?  It’s HELMET time!  Word.

November:

  • poopenfrafenfrafa
  • Oh Seat warmers..I love you and my butt does too.
  • ….and sleep.
  • I am taking my germy butt to Walmart.  To everyone in Smyrna I am sorry, please stay away from there today unless you are a bad human which in that case you can go and I hope you catch my germ.  If I don’t do this today my family will starve and we will not have our coffee which leads to grumpy tired parents that have not had their daily dose of crack and that could get ugly.  My apologies
  • Off to a good start..just crushing my son’s world at every turn this am…he does not like me today.
  • I am throwing in the towel and raising a finger to today.  Even the damn Fed Ex dude couldn’t smile, just here sign this.  Have a nice flipp’n day to you too old man.
  • I am so freaking excited right now..I might pee my pants!
  • I told Em she needs to sit down and start marking things that she really wants in the catalogs we have so we can tell Santa.  I glance over and she has circled everything on two pages.  I said “you can’t circle everything’ and she says “I didn’t, see I didn’t mark that one”.  It was the only thing on the two pages that wasn’t marked.
  • I just got a little too excited when I realized it was time to break out the Christmas Socks!
  • Dead asleep on the couch before 9pm.  I AM the Friday Night Wild Child.
  • I’s be wrapp’n some prezents up in the Pfister hizouse.  Word.

 

 

About Jamie

Taking my time through this A-Mazing thing called my life. I'm the owner and photographer at The Adore Girls here in Nashville TN. Life is what you make of it and I am making mine...AMAZING!

Posted on December 9, 2010, in Humor, life, Me and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.

  1. I have yet to do my summary. I do love your updates, most people are extremely lame!

  2. I love the one in March about the flip flops!

    And your November one about the seat warmers, I’m pretty sure I’ve been saying that every day for last couple weeks. My butt is constantly cold. It’s like a jiggly ice cube.

  3. This was the greatest idea for a post.
    Now I am contemplating getting a FB. Seriously this was genius. I am soooo jealous.

    • Well if you do end up getting a fb look me up!!! We’s can be fb friends!
      And to think I did this post because I had nothing..just crickets chirping in my head….

  4. Nice! Have you got a link or the app name? Great idea to post them up!

    • Thanks! The App name is My Year in Status Appliciation. You should be able to find it by searching that if you can’t find it let me know and I’ll find the link!

  5. Ha ha, how did you manage to find all of your statuses? Did you just take the time to re-read them all on your FB page? This is a great idea for a post. I just have to ask…what on earth is “helmet time”???

    • HAHAHA! There is an app “My Year in Status” on facebook that summarizes all of your statuses and you have an option to pick the ones that you want which takes you to a screen that lists the majority of your statuses. I just went through and picked the ones that were my favorites.
      Helmet is an old heavy rock band from the mid 90’s that my husband and I are big fans of and that night of the status we were going to see them in concert! It was awesome!

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